Some Straightforward Guidance And Actions To Start Helping You Move Forward
Based on the Human Givens approach, the content of this page will enable you to start helping yourself using some simple methods. It helps to follow the sequence but its not essential.
Firstly Some Basic Knowledge About Your Mind
Our emotional states are determined by a set of universal human needs. If we want to give full play to our power, manifest our potential and overcome emotional issues that otherwise narrow down our thinking, achieving these needs appropriately is vital. This is the universal human foundation for wellbeing and self development.
Every single one of us is born with these essential physical and emotional needs, and, if we are born healthy, the innate resources to help us fulfil them. It is often something going wrong with our resources that prevents us from meeting our needs naturally. This may be due to physical or psychological damage, the lack of appropriate life skills, or by our environment being especially toxic.
These innate needs have evolved over millions of years and are our common biological inheritance, whatever your cultural background.
It is now clear that these emotional needs can be categorised as follows:
- Security — safe territory and an environment which allows us to develop fully
- Attention (to give and receive it) — a form of nutrition
- Sense of autonomy and control — having volition to make responsible choices
- Emotional intimacy — to know that at least one other person accepts us totally for who we are, “warts ‘n’ all”
- Feeling part of a wider community
- Privacy — opportunity to reflect and consolidate experience
- Sense of status within social groupings
- Sense of competence and achievement
- Meaning and purpose — which come from being stretched in what we do and think, supporting our family and seeking deeper levels of understanding about life.
The Fundamental Resources We Have To Meet Our Needs
Nature has gifted us with instinctive knowledge of our needs and a set of inner resources to help us satisfy them. This is our very own 'guidance program' . They consists of:
- The ability to develop complex long term memory, which enables us to add to our innate knowledge and learn
- The ability to build rapport, empathise and connect with others
- Imagination, which enables us to focus our attention away from our emotions, use language and problem solve more creatively and objectively
- Emotions and instincts
- A conscious, rational mind that can check out our emotions, question, analyse and plan
- The ability to ‘know’ — that is, understand the world unconsciously through metaphorical pattern matching
- An observing self — that part of us that can step back, be more objective and be aware of itself as a unique centre of awareness, apart from intellect, emotion and conditioning
- A dreaming brain that preserves the integrity of our genetic inheritance every night by metaphorically defusing expectations held in the autonomic arousal system because they were not acted out the previous day.
The Givens Of Being Human
These resources together with our needs, make up what we call the "Human Givens".
By understanding the principles of how our emotional needs operate and using our guidance system properly, we can establish well being and live engaged, fulfilling and successful lives..
Now Take Action To Start Building A New Story For Your Life Straight Away
The story of your life will be the result of your ability to master your mind. The good news is, no matter what has already happened, it is always possible to start writing it in a new, more positive way immediately. It is not difficult to learn the basic skills to do this. It does not take expensive consultants or self styled gurus. There is no need to become mystified by the mystics. A few simple mechanisms and some basic knowledge about your mind, body and the natural environment is enough. With these in hand, your own mind will soon become your best teacher.